Still travelling, but I wanted to share this picture for obvious reasons.
Also I’ll be on vacation for the next eighteen days, so don’t run away.
clint barton getting his hand stuck in a jar of pickles trying to get the last one, forgetting about gravity, and tipping the jar upside down to try and lodge his hand out only to be drenched in pickle juice.
Requested by anonymous.
i frigging. LOVE my hair being touched sooo SO much and it never happens but oh ym god if you massage my head and play with my hair i will literally start purring like a cat
I am all about Bucky thinking that Captain America is a goddamn joke
and that it’s an even funnier joke when he finds out Cap is Steve
Because he knows Steve SO WELL he knows ALL THE WAYS he at once fits the persona perfectly and all the ways he doesn’t fit it at all. Steve…
#somebody calls steve ‘mature and responsible’ #steve looks all modest and goes ‘well thank y—’ #'you're KIDDING right' bucky interrupts #'he used to pick fights with guys three—no FOUR times his size #kept trying to join the army so he could what? shoot a few bullets before a fly landed on him and took him out for good? #then some guy whispered ‘psst you want us to make you bigger? we think it might work this time’ to him from a dark alley #and steve said ‘yeah okay’ and by some miracle it didn’t kill or deform him #so then he spent some time skipping around bopping nazis on the head #which yeah sure okay #but then I was gone maybe SIX MINUTES before he decided it would be fun to grab a plane and play chicken with an ocean #so that knocks him out for a while but when he wakes up does he decide to take it easy for a while?#maybe stop trying to give the people around him as many HAPS—that’s heart attacks per second—as possible?’ #'bucky—'#'shut up steve #the answer is no #no he does not #he starts fighting aliens #ALIENS I tell you #and after he gets knocked around by THEM things taper off for a while #only eight maybe nine unnecessary life-threatening stunts a week #until he decides it’s time to shake things up and takes on a vast government agency full of traitorous trained killers because why not? #oh but he gets help #two people #you know to even up the odds #and—’ #'BUCKY' #'shut up steve I'm telling her how mature and responsible you are' #'I'm sorry I forgot my parachute yesterday could you please just let it go' #'WE WERE FLYING OVER A DESERT DID YOU THINK YOU COULD DIVE INTO SAND JUST AS EASY AS WATER'#'I'm not used to putting chutes on! it was an honest mistake! I'm sorry ma'am here's your autograph we'll just go now c'mon buck'
*SKIPPING AROUND BOPPING NAZIS ON THE HEAD*
dying. just dying.
Please just leave me here to fucking die, I’m laughing so hard I can’t walk and it’s moved on to full on tears. I’ll just drown right here and now.
the main traits associated with slytherin are “ambition, cunning, resourcefulness” etc
now i have nothing against slytherins. i headcanon natasha as a slytherin and shes my babe and i myself am a slytherin
BUT EXACTLY WHERE IN BUCKY BARNES’S STORY IS “AMBITION AND CUNNING”
LIKE RESOURCEFULNESS I GET, YEAH, DEFINITELY
BUT BUCKY’S LIFE REVOLVED AROUND PROTECTING + PROVIDING FOR STEVE, THEN FIGHTING FOR HIS COUNTRY AGAINST NAZIS, THEN DYING FOR STEVE FUCKIN ROGERS
it wasn’t ambition that made him go to war - if he wasn’t drafted (which is my headcanon but ok) then i’ll tell you right now, he signed up bc bucky barnes’s entire core personality is: stand up to the bullies, just like steve
he’s less fierce about it - steve will pick fights with anyone, while i feel like bucky mainly only steps in if some kid’s already getting beat up
but you bet your ass he wasn’t gonna let fuckin nazis slaughter half of europe
also, cunning? ????????? ?? ? bucky’s street smart and book smart (don’t forget that his smithsonian memorial said he was the top of his class) but…cunning has connotations of like: sly, scheming, crafty, etc
bucky’s not a fox
he’s a dog
if that makes sense
bucky’s in fucking gryffindor, because he’s brave and daring, he’s got the nerve, he’s got the chivalry (we saw how he treated the girls on that double date)
and he’s got that neverending, fierce, unbreakable even by 70 years of brainwashing loyalty to steve
BUCKY BARNES IS GRYFFINDOR U BEST BELIEVE.
edit: or even like, gryffinpuff but c’mon not slytherin
[exasperated 90s sitcom character voice] magNetoooo
↳ “just as a flower does not choose its color, we are not responsible for what we have come to be. only once you realize this do you become free, and to become adult is to become free. " - stoker (2013)